WHEN CRITICS RISE UP!

Since giving my heart to the Lord over 20 years ago, I have consistently served in some capacity or another in my local church. One thing I have learnt through these years of service is that facing criticism comes with the territory. For most of these years I would say I have somewhat been able to handle it. But recently I have been struggling, as the pressure has suddenly been turned up. So, I turned to God’s Word as I often do when I feel overwhelmed. And God taught me something so important about how to respond to criticism. And I want to share some of my thoughts with you:

1. Criticism Often Comes in Seasons of Transition

Critics pop up in certain seasons of your life. Resentment, which is hidden, and longstanding usually rears its head when a change to your life situation triggers it. This kind of criticism could come from a deep-seated bitterness, unforgiveness, jealousy or even anger.

2. Discern the Source and Spirit

Not all criticism is an attack. Sometimes a critic speaks truthfully, however we need to be careful of its source. Does it come from a place of love or a place of resentment? Constructive criticism from a place of love, disciplines and allows for growth and holds us accountable for our actions. But criticism becomes dangerous for the critic when it stems from resentment. Those who criticise others are also held just as accountable for their actions.

SCRIPTURE READING - 2 Samuel 16:5-14

'As King David approached Bahurim, a man from the same clan as Saul’s family came out from there. His name was Shimei son of Gera, and he cursed as he came out. He pelted David and all the king’s officials with stones, though all the troops and the special guard were on David’s right and left. As he cursed, Shimei said, “Get out, get out, you murderer, you scoundrel! The Lord has repaid you for all the blood you shed in the household of Saul, in whose place you have reigned. The Lord has given the kingdom into the hands of your son Absalom. You have come to ruin because you are a murderer!”  

Then Abishai son of Zeruiah said to the king, “Why should this dead dog curse my lord the king? Let me go over and cut off his head.” But the king said, “What does this have to do with you, you sons of Zeruiah? If he is cursing because the Lord said to him, ‘Curse David,’ who can ask, ‘Why do you do this?’ ” David then said to Abishai and all his officials, “My son, my own flesh and blood, is trying to kill me. How much more, then, this Benjamite! Leave him alone; let him curse, for the Lord has told him to. It may be that the Lord will look upon my misery and restore to me his covenant blessing instead of his curse today.”  

So David and his men continued along the road while Shimei was going along the hillside opposite him, cursing as he went and throwing stones at him and showering him with dirt. The king and all the people with him arrived at their destination exhausted. And there he refreshed himself. '

A Biblical Example

In this portion of scripture, we find David at the heart of the story. He is probably at the lowest point of his life. After suffering very severe consequences of his earlier sins, he now has to flee Jerusalem because he temporarily loses his throne to his son Absalom. This was a very public and humiliating betrayal by both his family and loyal followers.

As David was on the run, he comes across a man named Shimei. And this man just relentlessly starts cursing David. As David and his men marched away from Jerusalem, this man continues to physically throw stones and dirt and hurls endless curses at David.

So, who was this guy and why was he so upset with David? The Bible tells us that Shimei was from Saul’s family. And from the way he was cursing David you could sense his hatred of David stemmed from years of anger and bitterness. Shimei’s very personal grudge started from the time Saul was killed, and David had taken over as king.

Shimei’s resentment towards David was certainly longstanding but unwarranted. David had no part in Saul’s death. In fact, David consistently declared that he would not lay a hand on “the Lord’s anointed.” Saul ultimately died by his own hand on the battlefield. Shimei’s anger towards David was unjustified and his view of David’s actions was totally distorted.

Now that David had seemingly lost power to his own son, Absalom. Shimei had suddenly felt the urge to publicly and openly curse David. For Shimei, this was a perfect time for him to let loose years of pent-up frustration towards David’s initial rise to power. The thing that I found interesting was that Shimei was not mentioned in the Bible prior to this incident. So, we see this guy literally crawl out of the woodwork to come out and curse David.

When Hidden Grudges Appear

This is the first point I want to make. Sometimes, people will come out in criticism when they are triggered by some kind of change in your position. Always be vigilant when you are suddenly facing unwarranted criticism. These feelings don’t come from nowhere. Even though you might not have directly caused or did anything wrong to this person, they can hold grudges which can lie dormant for years. And all it takes is some kind of transition in your life for those true feelings to suddenly surface. David may have been at his lowest when Shimei pops up, but these feelings can also be triggered when people rise above their station and are at a point of promotion in their lives.

Restraint Is Key

The second point that I want to make in this story was why David stopped his men from killing Shimei. The easiest way to have stopped Shimei’s attack would have been for David’s guards to take Shimei out. David’s men were upset by Shimei’s curses, and they were ready to literally chop his head off. But David stopped them from doing anything to hurt or to stop Shimei’s barrage of curses.

To understand why David felt compelled not to kill Shimei, we need to understand David’s frame of mind. David was going through a lot, both spiritually and politically. We also have to look at the story in context of the many events which led up to this point. You see, much earlier in the story, the Prophet Nathan had prophetically rebuked David. This was after David went to the point of ordering Bathsheba’s husband Uriah to be killed. The consequences of those actions rocked him to his core. And this made him really understand the devastating nature and consequences of his sin. It was Nathan’s God-given rebuke that brought David back to his senses. David was convicted by what Nathan had said, he repented, and he did not want to ever risk losing God’s favour again.

So, when Shimei started to criticise David, David possibly allowed himself to believe it could also be God’s way of keeping him in check. David felt that perhaps God was allowing Shimei to hold him accountable for his previous actions. But in reality, Shimei’s accusations were distorted and largely untrue.

In Truth and Love

Sometimes when we face criticism, we need to take a step back and listen to what is being said. We need to investigate if there is truth to it and if it’s coming from a place of love. Although harsh, not everything is an attack against us. God can use people to keep us in check and to hold us accountable for our actions.

David recognised this, and he didn’t want to stop his own spiritual growth if that was what God could have been doing through Shimei. But David also trusted that God would vindicate him if he showed restraint against any retaliation towards Shimei accusations.

True Intentions Always Turn Up

David felt so strongly about this that he goes on to even save Shimei’s life. Later on in the story we see David restored to power and Shimei begs David for forgiveness for what he did. And David pardons him. David always suspected what Shimei’s true intentions were, but he was unsure. We see this, when David was on his death bed. His last words to his son Solomon were for him to use his wisdom to decide what to do with Shimei. Unfortunately for Shimei, Solomon’s wisdom weeds out his true intentions.

Shimei betrays Solomons trust by disobeying a direct command Solomon gives him. Shimei could not submit to Solomon’s authority as king, just as Shimei refused to submit to David’s authority. So, Solomon has him executed. Showing us, that we should never take God’s grace and mercy for granted. Our true intentions will eventually turn up.

David was merciful, forgiving and willing to give Shimei the benefit of the doubt and by doing so kept his hands clear of Shimei’s blood. And thus, also giving Shimei an opportunity to set his own life right. But it was Shimei’s own actions that eventually led to his own demise. What we also need to recognise is that we might not see justice in our generation. God might leave it to the next generation to bring to completion what was started in ours. We need to be able to leave things in God’s hands, step back and resist the urge to retaliate against those who oppose us.

The Battle Is The Lord’s

There is so much we can take from this portion of scripture. I am so glad that God extends the same grace to us. When people come out in criticism of us, we need to understand that it is more a reflection of their character than ours. God will always defend and shield us from any attack. All we need to do is persevere through it. Although criticism can be physically and mentally exhausting. It’s ultimately God’s battle. By showing restraint and not taking out our own revenge or taking any offence, we allow God to do His work not only in our lives, but we allow God to do a work in that person’s life as well.

To Defend Or Attack

But what happens when we don’t do this? Well, we might find ourselves perpetually stuck in a defensive cycle. Just as David’s men wanted to defend David. When we give into criticism, we will find ourselves in a constant battle to clear our names. The more we fight back the more criticism will come our way. Thus, holding us back, never being able to move forward and never claiming our rightful authority.

The same is true for those who constantly find themselves criticising and refusing to submit to authority. They will never be able move beyond that critical spirit, because they will be constantly finding new things to criticise. It was that very disobedience that got Shimei killed, he could not bring himself to submit to any authority, not even after his life had been spared by David.

Stay Focused, Stay Quiet, and Keep Moving Forward

David’s handling of this situation taught me that the wisest way to deal with those who come up against us is to, stay quiet and to keep moving forward. The road may leave us exhausted, but when we stay focused on the path ahead and stop listening to every voice we hear, we will eventually find rest. God will take care of everything else.

2 Samuel 16:13-14

'So David and his men continued along the road while Shimei was going along the hillside opposite him, cursing as he went and throwing stones at him and showering him with dirt. The king and all the people with him arrived at their destination exhausted. And there he refreshed himself. '

 

All my Love...